Do you love me, even with my dark side?

 These days, I am not really sure what bless and gift has God sent me, when all of sudden everything on my love life turn upside bright. Yeah indeed it is. Feels like sunny sided egg rose out of nowhere. The feeling is wonderful and just wonderful. oh, so sweet.

I remember when initially,  my 'kesayangan'  (which is I not sayang enough,'') said that he won't or cannot fell in love with me, or whatsoever cliche remarks from an egoistic Powerful man. Keke. Well, it's fine. As am gonna keep on clapping one hand with little sound. I keep on insisting, seducing, playing like nobody else businesses.  (this part is not so true yeah, children :P)

After quite a while we still keep going, running, surviving, and building not like the concrete wall, nor skyscraper, but just like a trees, beautiful trees; Pine Tree or Coconut tree I guess. We're keep running far far behind against all the impossibilities like crazy. Yet, still fight, argues and so much misunderstood came up like no ends. 

It start with small tiny things. Yeah like everyone in  every relationship does.

Till then, when I started to play a BAD girl part which lying, lying a bit, little lies, big Lies, and become quite a liar. Kekek. Can't help it darling.

I know my sorry, apologies won't enough for the betrayals and distrust I have done.

Well, you know old saying says; what have done cannot be undone.

Somehow, teacher says, good person built with a best virtue will always surviving. Yes, its true. 
I'm glad he quite good person built with best virtues, that keep this 'humpty-dumpty grr' saved.

I am appreciates everything and every moment has given to me.

So does anyone eh?

Also, wish this is not going to be a manipulating neither hanky-panky or revenge.

Everyone has their dark side eh darling.
So do I.


Till then,

God bless us and have a merry happy cherry weekend!~


Much love and Xo's

I have a DREAMs.

Have a happy Sunday people!

Have you ever come to realization that everything you was dream of to have / to feel/ to experience in life came one by one as it is invisible? You dreamt of having a car, one-two-three years from the day you were dreaming, you achieve it! Or it might as well take 12-15 years long to have; depends on how hard you pursue for it and I'd love to say;  your luck!

Speaking of luck, I never been such a 'Lucky Girl'. Sometimes  I do, but not most of the time it happens. Also, lucks is not revolving us all the time right? Thus,for any reason I believe that its on how much we want it,the universe will conspire everything to make it happens et we get it.

Being a dreamer does makes me wonder.

I am a big dreamer ever since I was young. Despite the silly dreams and unreasonable daydreaming makes me looks LAME, but from now on, I believe that I shouldn't have to stop TO DREAM.

Yeah, I have a DREAM with lots of -sssss and word BIG on it.

Some more, I believe that from this moment; everyone is lucky, everyone has it own DREAMS and they deserve to achieve it!

Thus, don't bother to judge and evaluate others life when you not even in their shoes.

another dream came true.

Nice gastronomic treats. Despite the very pricey for nasi goreng!

Oh yeah, btw, It is 23rd Ramadhan so far. Alhamdulillah.

Be safe and take care everyone.

Frumpish.

14th Ramadhan.

Out of nowhere, I breath and walk. Not aware of  surrounding and everything; typical place and face. Seen common unwanted faces too.

Feels like I know you, just I can't remember who you are.
It feels strange. Indeed when you see the stranger.

Frumpish women here and there.
I am terrified.
It looks scary,. or just undefine.

I feel blue.

Next time you point a Finger, I point you to the MIRROR.

Hello people!

How are you? Happy friday and cherish the day. We never realize how much a day could be meaningful for ones, until it left.

Luckily, it's break for me today since yesterday is Sports Day at school ( am gonna update of this later) and now, we've reward with extra -rest day. Finger crossed , school!

Have you ever heard of 'substitute lover'?
Have heard or not have heard? Gege. If you do, well done. If not let me explain.

Substitute lover on my definition is where you have a friend; basically a male friend where you got close with each other, cherish each other and have fun together while both of you are together . This is just oh sounded like we belong together as Mariah Carey said; but then FRAPPP! you are nothing but less just a substitute lover. You enjoy the moment together; is only when both of you have nothing else 'better' to be with together; thus you can call and-or use your substitute lover to be with you and be happy together.
Err.. it's a win-win situation, BTW.

Whatever you name it; it might sounded like Friends for benefits, wtf watsoever!

And here come to my rational realization that there is no such ' oh so lovely you, after all.
 After all, dwelling in fantasy is just so possessing that even realities could be bit.

 For a stronger remarks; I would rather say that next time you point a finger, I'll point you to the mirror!

a flameless name

There's a tree standing tall behind the wall,
Long and still, 
Green and lush,
Just like that.


There's a little girl,
Not so little; within the age,
Playing with the flame,
Burning the games.


Here comes the mom,
As pure as shes always reborn
Genuinely compassion like you've never knew too.
Ask the little girl to stand still like the green tree.
As the danger is coming close too.


Oh na. na. little won't listen,
Stubborn like a stone. 
Firing the cards  till ashes the only left.


Oh na..na.. little girl, 
You've got burnt by the flame.
Scars remain in your sane.


Oh na...na.. little girl,
Now you've got burnt,
Where else you would like to add the wound?


* This is a piece suddenly written by me. It represent my emotion, my thought at this moment* But never mind, it just an art. No relations with alive nor dead people.

Till then, be safe and have a good control in life.
Yeah, life always good when you treat her real GOOD!
Ciao. xx

Keep Humble, Be simple.

Image source: Google.com

They said,
once you're on top it's hard to get down. But beware everyone! You might just fall in a blink of second.


XOXO's
.

It's Really Okay.

This post might sound a bit emotional or too frank.
Well, this is my solely blog written by me. So, if you feel like it's not fit your taste, then you are very welcome to click X on the right side.
Thanks.


I still remember how broke I am when I really determine to move on from someone, something that has gave another meaning of life to me; before.
As I mention in previous post, the bittersweet of it.

Letting go, and move on or the same meaning with it is always the easiest thing to say, but hardest thing to do.

I bet it is TRUE.

Well, you might say oh-so-crap! but, hee~ everyone has their own way of living right. It just the matter of time that you can overcome and get used with it. Always, a time. So people, do check out the book ' A Brief History of Time'. :)

______________________________________________________________

After sometimes being so strong and looked up on a brighter side, now again, I face the situation which want me to decide. The good and bad of it.

And I bet, it always harder and hardest initially and will be better, eventually.

Life is not always sweeter as we wanted. The bitter of it taught us to put a little sugar.



Anyway, do enjoy this latest number from the goddess of music 'Coldplay' and sexayy ' Rihanna'.
I always in love with them.




Princess of China.


Till then, gute nacht and take care everyone.
Heart*i should put a real determination on it*.:)

The Days;

Hello people!

Wie geht es dir?
Hee.
Danke god, Wie get es dir! :)

Well, here's weekend coming again as boring as usual. Keke. Nothing much just staying home the whole day, relaxing and dealing with the terrible nasal problem. Yesterday, I went outing with a friend; darling Meris. Keke. Just a simple hang out but unfortunately has made me dead broking.
Gosh, thinking of the coming holiday that need bucks, I'm almost fallen out.

Okay, skip the crap!

These days, I am more into do blogging rather than updating crap in another social networking sites. I think this is due to the convenience here that I can write long; winding this and that and not letting the whole world got an 'instant updates' of my personal life. I know, that want it or not, this is the eras of globalization; which everything is only on tips of our hand. So does this blogging, anyone and just everyone can read them. But not as instant as the famous Facebook! Whatever it is, always be cautious and non-reckless while dealing with the modern internet, people. Once we careless, nah everything might happen.

Anyway, this is just a quick updates. I have so much to tell but sometimes, things are better not to be told or else u screw up.


Till then, be safe and be good people.


May Allah always watch and guides our way.
Ameen.

Kawan atau Lawan?

Mabuhay people!

How's everything going?

As always, it's my hope that everyone will be in a pink of health (keke) as well as in protection and guidance of Allah s.w.t.

Pada hari ini, saya hanya ingin berbicara tentang manusia, dan orang disekeliling kita. Terutamanya rakan, ataupun kawan.

Semua orang mempunyai kawan. Betul tak? Tidak kisahla ianya kawan rapat, kawan-kawan, kawan sekelas, kawan sehati sejiwa dan lain-lain. Hidup tanpa kawan umpama burung terbang seekor. (Tak logik2). Hee. Well, yeah I know everyone have to admit the "BIG" roles of kawan in our daily life. Disini, aku x maulah tekankan tentang pentingnya ataupun IMPORTANCE of friend dalam kehidupan seharian... Sebabnya, memang banyak berlaku KAWAN makan KAWAN.

Cuba anda-anda semua tengok anak2 kucing yang sibuk berkeliaran di mana2. Jalan2, kemudian terjumpa seekor anak kucing yang lain, mungkin mereka berkenalan; berbahasa dalam bahasa kucing mereka dan akhirnya bermain bersama. Sweet kan! Comel gitu!.
Begitu juga manusia, kita ni manusia yang memang sudah sedia mempunyai akal otak fikiran yang boleh fikir baik buruk, banding beza itu-ini; kalau jumpa seseorang *new*, mestilah perkara first we do is give a very pleasant smile. Ye tak? Hee, kemudian, borak ; Hi, hello. Anda dari mana? dan sebagainya dan kemudian berlanjutan kepada hal2 dunia yang menyeronokkan dan mengalpakan. Begitulah gamaknya (based on location and what ocassion you are and that person that u might OR will consider as friend).

Heee. Sebelum kemelalutan semakin panjang, ada baiknya jika aku terus kepada the MAIN POINT saja.

Pertama, dalam banyak-banyak orang yang anda panggil KAWAN tu mungkin hanya seorang dua saja yang benar-benar KAWAN dari istilah kemanusiaan. Yang lain-lain tu anda boleh panggil dua / tiga EKOR.

Aku dah banyak kali nampak, lihat, involve with this kind of people, yang depan kawan dia bukan main baik lagi bak ANGEL from HEAVEN. Tapi, dok selang beberapa hari sebelum bersama si kawan, bukan main mak nenek lagi dok mengata si KAWAN itu.
For heaven sake, please stop being a UGLY witches girls.
I tell you what, based from my POV; perempuan2 yang suka mengumpat ini (esp. those few girls I saw in class) yang asyik-asyik menyibuk hal orang memang sangat HODOH.
Terus terang aku cakap.
They become HODOH bukan disebabkan hidung sengkek, mata juling atau gigi braces sana sini. Tapi disebabkan hati busuk mereka yang tak habis2 meyibuk dan kemudian mengata orang. Namun depan si*mangsa* ini pula boleh pulak berlakon bagaikan Malaikat turun dari Firdausi.

Ya Rabbi, simpang malaikat 44. Ameen.

Yang ketiga, this kind of I'm a HOLY GIRL on earth. I am Mother Theresa; Kindness is my virtue, bla bla bla yang sangat ideal. Wahh. semua orang boleh jadi baik darling. Everyone has their angle and evil side. But please, can you just be your real self? Bukannya mau condemn this kind of bajet baik people, akan tetapi perangai yang dibuat-buat itu amat sangat menyakitkan mata , jantung dan jiwa si pemerhati. Mungkin kau selesa dengan gaya dan sikap ke-HOLY-an mu itu, namun kau mungkin tidak sedar sebenarnya banyak mata-mata yang sedang memerhati tingkahmu itu. Especially, the Almighty.

Hehe.

Btw, sekadar ini sajalah muntahan fikiran dan perasaan dari saya untuk kali ni. Malas rasanya untuk menyatakan this kind of thing but somehow ada masa-saat dan waktunya yang saya rasa macam dah tak tahan. Banyak lagi sebenarnya kriteria2 kawan yang langsung tak DESERVE to be called as FRIEND yang ingin aku muntahkan sini. Tapi aku tahan-tahan dululah.
Banyak lagi kerja berfaedah yang layak dan lebih membahagiakan untuk aku lakukan.

Heeee. Jaga diri semua!


P/s: Terkilan dengan sikap bitch yang memang Bitches! Sudah diberikan kebaikan (tolong belikan tiket dsb) akhirnya mementingkan diri sendiri. Gods watching over us, darling!.

Every night is a Wonderland.

I'm not really sure what is and how is it to feel in a serious relationship.
All I know is Life is Short.
Have fun and appreciate everyone that give much significant meaning to you.
To those who are sucks and bitches, just throw them away.
They don't deserve you.



Lot's of love and cheers the day!

Hold up a Light.

Anyone can get yr wrong even in a minute.
All those good deeds and sincerity you have shown all this while might disappear in a blink of an eye.

Anyone can pretend like holy,
even though they are a bunches of holy shit.
Keep pretending sinner,
as god always know what you do in front and behind.

No matter how hard life treat you,
just hold up a light
like TRAVIS.

Heee.:)

I had No Idea. Oh gosh!

Dear readers,

I just need a good song with a good mood to write a love letter for u. Hehe. The feeling I had now is just so unsure due to the PMS keke . Don't get me wrong. PMS stands for Practicum Mode Stress. =))
Obviously, after sometime knowing you, it has made the days colorful. No more duller days. (Eventhough i rarely had one, keke. Sounds hypocrite eh?) As Dalai Lama says;

"Old friends pass away, new friends appear. It is just like the days. An old day passes, a new day arrives. The important thing is to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend - or a meaningful day''.

-Dalai Lama-

Nah,this is life, that is life and everything needs life. The trees, flowers, animals, microorganism and just everything! we move from one pace to another every day and at the end of the day we will know what it will be. and referring to the Dalai Lama ponds; I have two things in mind. First; a meaningful friend sounds appreciating. I don't see the selfishness there and obviously shows the importance of a friend that we are truly deeply appreciate them.
In contrary, at a first thought of a meaningful day seems like its just focusing on you, yourself and the friends existence has makes your day meaningful. and that's all. The friend itself doesn't play a big role on you, but it does give impacts to your day.
Umm.. so which one u choose?

O.* (blurred^^')
By the way,for whatever reason it is, just appreciate anyone that had come into your life and give such happiness and brightness to your every single breath.


A person might coming with a good start, a full flowery-blooming hearts with such a poetic -rhythmic words that makes world like no others business. You hypnotized and fallen' for no obvious reason. Unluckily, at some times that you never realized, the things has changed and no more romeo et juliette poetic words that makes you flying high to the skies.
And now you realize with a big rolling eyes like this ; O.O that those blooming days are gone and the person that has come with a sweet fruits scents has turned into a gross fish trash stinks!

Keke.

** Wonder why did I sound pessimist here?

Well, that's the fact of life.


umm. O.O. ^^'

Any-any-way,thanks to anyone that bring joy and laughs to my day and be safe always.
:)

Dance in the Rain.

credit images to: GoogleImages -Crafthunters.

Thoughts for today;

At some pace of life, we did feel like floating and flying up to the sky with some unnecessary reasons. We known each other, we fell in like
then we go step further by deeply liking each other. At this stages of life, all we know is wanted to be happy and gain happiness. The smiles, shining eyes and blooming hearts is all wrapped in one.

***

Despite all that, it is our nature; human nature to have those pessimist and inferior feeling sometimes. Thus, fight it. Live our life today like there's no tomorrow. Appreciate anything, anyone and just everything that makes your life colorful today. All the dullness of yesterday, leave them aside and stand up for your life today.
You never know until you try.


***

Some old saying says;
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning how to dance in rain.
Thus, treasure it.


youknowiloveyou,
XO

Cause It's All In My Head.

"Adakah semua ini yang kuinginkan
Ataupun hanya mengejar dunia semata-mata
Ku harap ku masih percaya..."


Hello everyone!
Comment allez-vous?

As for always, may everyone always in a pink of health with bless and cares of Allah s.w.t.
Ameen.


As u seen above, I have put some quotes in Malay there. Actually it's not a quote but some lyrics from Aizat Amdan song entitled- Sungai Lui. This song actually is refering to his hometown Sungai Lui somewhere in Muar, if I'm not mistake. Check here.

Well, the best part of this song is when one of the guy *in red shirt* stating that;
Home-- it could be anywhere in the world. But when you feel the sense of belonging, that is HOME.

:)

You're TRUE, dude. Really agree with that.
Just like my condition now, I'm living in a hostel which obviously not my exact HOME. But somehow I do feel my belonging here. So no offense. It could be anywhere.

Speaking of which, I still in love talking about gratefulness -- bersyukur and have faith in Allah s.w.t ( The Almighty). This is because, I do admit that sometimes or most all of the time* perhaps, that we - as human being always forget the real responsibilities that we hold, born into this world. We have fun, overly enjoy-ed with those 'POP' Culture be it in entertainment, fashion, lifestyle, music etc. etc.
You wanna be a GAGA?

Haha.
ask yourself.

Somehow, I have realized that be it good or bad, Allah will always with us. It's just us, the 'human being' that always and keen to forget HIM and HIS mercy.
Uhm.hmm.
Poor us.
May Allah forgave the mistakes then.

ameen.

Anyway, I think that's all for now. Cause it seems I can't think that2 proper at the moment since there's so-ooooo-oo many things running through my head rite now.
It spin here and there baby.
:')

Till then,

Be safe and always cherish your day with loves.

xoxo,
hugs*

The Littlest Thing.

image : sekadar gambar hiasan. :) ^^''

source: MY COLLECTION.

Hi everyone!

Lets give a thought on this quotes first, before we move to another part of my 'random talk'.
--Sometimes the littlest thing in life changes something forever and there will be times when you wish you can go back to how things used to be, but you just can't because things have changed so much.--


Well, that's just an induction set anyway. Sometimes we have to remind ourselves in certain thing in life. Especially the tiniest one. :)
Because, don't you think that from a little tumor, it could grow to a threatening cancer? Which, sooner or later, damages the system in your body, till nothing can save you. Except two things; FATE and GOD.:)

Btw, I'm not intended to be long, since there's nothing much to talk about. Currently I'm really in a peak moment of hectic-ness, since the assignments deadlines are really looming. So, no option. I have to complete them all anyway.

Thanks Allah, I manage to complete one. Another 3 to go!.
Aja-aja Fighting!>''<

[notes]: I need to relieve the stress a bit by writing here.
I miss HOME.

Be safe & take care.
lots of love,
.xoxo.

Bawaku Terbang Tinggi, Melewati Si Awan Nan Biru.

As-salam, everyone!:)

How are you, today?

As usual, my deep concern that everyone is in a very good health with such a bright & positive's thought.
ameen.

***
Some said;

credit images; GOOGLE images.:)

Don't pass any chance to go someplace nice, near or far.
Well, I would love to thanking AIR ASIA btw, for making every dreams come true. With such great deals for a trip starting from 29th September 2011 till 29the February 2012, I'm sure everyone will feel like heaven.
2 hearts goes one.wink*~*

***

Okay, I'm done with those travel--vacation thingies. Now, let me do a little self monologue here. (Let me speak in bahasa, anyway).:)

Seperti yang anda2 semua tahu, hidup is all about ...? hehe.
Sendiri mau jawabla kan. Some ppl said about money la, about challenges la, about karma la and etc.etc. Well, of course, I admit. Life can be anything! Dan siapa yang bertanggungjawab untuk mencoraknya, ask yourself. Bak kata pepatah Melayu, "tepuk dada, tanya selera", kan?
Oleh itu, bercakap tentang mencorak-corak ini, sejauh manakah corak kehidupan yang kita lakarkan dalam perjalanan hidup kita ini, memberi kepuasan kepada kita semua?

Jauh ke, x jauh ke, cantik, or vice versa, sendiri mau fikirlahkan.
Memang betul, sudah menjadi sifat manusia, x pernah berpuas hati terhadap sesuatu.
Sikit-sikit, ada saja mau diprotes, di bantah, dimogok, di komen, di rusuh & yang sewaktu dengannya lah.
Hmm... tapi apa salahnya, kalau kita cuba untuk menghargai dan bersyukur?
Bukankah lebih manis tu? Dan yang pasti, lahiriah menghargai dan bersyukur ini datang dengan pakej keredhaan juga.
Let's say, kalau ada satu benda yang kita sangaaaaaaaaaaaaat sayang hilang, [sengaja letak 'a' panjang, biar emphasize sikit..hehe^^'] ataupun rosak or somehow memang dah x boleh guna lagi dah. What will you do? Adakah kita perlu menangis-nangis [mcm bebudak laki mintak robot canggih] untuk mendapatkan semula benda tersebut?
Or else, contohlah jika kita kehilangan orang yang kita sangat sayangi, seperti ahli keluarga misalnya, memanglah super-duper sedih kan?
Saya pasti, kadang2 serasanya sukar untuk menerima hakikat-hakikat things macam tu.

Namun mahu atau tidak, kita harus juga menerima HAKIKAT yang telah ditentukan tersebut.
Dalam erti kata lain REDHA. Kan salah satu tonggak dalam Rukun IMAN kita pun ada menyatakan tentang --Beriman kepada Qada' & Qadar--.
Jadi, apa juga keadaan pun, belajarlah untuk meredhai. Walau pahit, sakit, perit macam manapun, belajar untuk menerima. [Banyak juga konteks2 dalam Hubungan Etnik yang menekankan prinsip penerimaan ni] hehe^^'

***
Baiklah, nampaknya, saya 'terlebih sudah' bermonolog dalaman ini. Walaupun sebenarnya niat asal mengemaskini blog hari ini adalah untuk berbicara tentang; ''How To Lead A Healthy Life". hehe. Ini semua akan saya cuba omongkan dalam next episode.
Serba sedikit tentang cara hidup yang sihat ini :- semuanya bermula dari dalaman kita. Inner side. Kalau inner side kita suci, murnih dan bersih ...hehe InshaAllah, it glows outside. xyah susah payah mau tempek mekap tebal2, kalau dah sistem tubuh badan kita ni sihat, dapat nutrien secukupnya, InshaAllah semuanya akan selamat.
:)




Sekian saja!

[notakaki]: terlalu banyak benda yang perlu perhatian segera*.
hehe. aja-aja Fighting!'' [mode: sleepy..zzz~]

A Place Where You Belong.

Life is a destiny; they said.
But according to Blair Waldrof; destiny is for a loser.
Well for me, plant first; fruits later.

....
without seeds, you'll never get the fruits right?


Remember:
no matter how far you've run ; how high you climb; you will always find back a place where you belong .


in a memory of.
.u.


footnotes; credit images to Fatin Filzah blog-->.<--

Kotobian Tadau Tagazo Do Kaamatan~

Hello blogging world.~
I am back again.
Lepas berkurun lamanya x update2, now I berkesempatan jugak.
Alhamdulillah.

By the way,today is Tadau Kaamatan which is Harvest Festival in Sabah, state below the wind, u.
hehe:)
Kotobian Tadau Tagazo do Kaamatan to all.=)
Tapikan, one thing yang I kurang gemar time2 ni, ialah apabila ramai orang gemar "Mabuk" dan memabukkan diri. huhu^^
Kalau dalam bahasa omputehnya "drunk".uh..uh..
Kalau mabuk, x menyusahkan orang xpa. Tapi, kalau da sampai bekejar-kejaran and tikam menikam, uh..uh..u scared me a lot dude. really.
ngeri rasanya.

Why I'm talking this, sebab last 30th, I pegila keluar with one fren. Hendak makan, sebanrnya. Perut lapar, plus cafe pun tutup, so pegila keluar.
Suddenly, tengok semua orang dok ribut dan berwajah cemas. Macam baru ternampak UFO turub ke bumi.hehe;)
Then, sedang we syok and curios wat happen, i nampak botol arak yg pecah plus cam ada titisan berwarna merah.*darah kah?*

uh..uh..

Okay, we teruskan melangkah, then I'll stop by dekat satu parfume booth and ask

Me:" Apakah yang berlaku?"
Cik Penjual Parfume: " Ada orang bertikam.huhu^^.
Tadi dorang lari dari situ sampai pegi sini."
Me: "Ohh...okay.Mana suda dorang?"
Cik Penjual Parfume: "x tau.Tadi dorang lari sampai blkg Servay sambil bedarah-darah."

Okay, begitulah lebih kurang ceritanya, setelah dipendekkan.Kesimpulannya, dorang ne mabuk minum2. Then, kalau dah fikiran x betul tulah mula keluar perangai macam s*t*n.huhu^^
Dah, x waras. Itulah juga hikmahnya, Allah mengharamkan arak; air syaitan itu.

By the way, I'm not here to give tazkirah or so, cause diri sendiri pun terlalu banyak perlu diperbaikkan.

There She Goes~

A good song, a nice Movies & a great laugh;
Makes everything flies high,
Up to the sky.

No more tears; no more sadness.
Love my life.

I fully rely to Allah the Almighty.

xoxo;